Relief, Frustration, Nerves, Joy, Fun!

Last week was a kind of a nerver-wracking week. We spent the entire week fretting about the impending court date we had on Friday the 7th for Amber and Hugh to sign the relinquishments. Our worries did not lie in whether or not Amber and Hugh would sign, but if the Tribe would try to refuse letting them sign. I know Amber and Hugh were in knots,too.

They arrived on Thursday at 2pm and we had a quiet evening at home just reconnecting and chillin', oh and laughing. Amber and Hugh bestowed gifts on all 3 of us. They got us each a Disney mug (Mickey and Pooh) and got Aedyn a cute wintery stuffed Pooh bear. Amber's parents,Kelli and Larry, were kind of enough to extend the love of caffeine with a Starbucks card and got Aedyn the cutest little blankie called a Taggie with his name embroidered on it!Amber got to hold Aedyn, and visit with him, as Hugh made "Wookie"sounds and helped Shane fix the trains around the Christmas tree! It was nice having them here. My mom came to watch Aedyn because our lawyer said it was not a good idea to have him in the courtroom. We all tried to get some sleep,but it was hard to rest easy.

The next morning we all made it to the court in Ventura where Amber and Hugh signed the Indian Reliquishments in front of the judge. They had to be sworn in and everything. (the consents were signed as a precautionary and strategic move in anticipation that the tribe would make Hugh or Aedyn a member). Our lawyer actually asked some pertinent questions from them about whether or not they think Aedyn is an Indian child, and whether or not Hugh leads an Indian lifestyle. This was good because if the tribe continues to pursue the matter then when we go back to court for an actual hearing, and their testimony will be valid because it was recorded by the court reporter. Oh by the way, as of now Aedyn is not an Indian child, but if the tribe decides to make Hugh or Aedyn a member, (they can do this at any time before finalization), then we will have to battle this in court because he will then be considered an indian child. It's complicated, and as the judge said, "this is an unprecendented case."

Amber and Hugh were wonderful! I was so proud of both of them. My hands were sweating and all Shane and I had to do was sit there! They are strong young people, and we are glad to have them a part of our lives!Their visit was short because they had to fly home Friday night to be back for a wedding the next day in Reno!

Saturday morning we had a wonderful cuddle and playtime in our bed, where Aedyn just cooed, and smiled. He always wakes up in the best moods! After my Mom left to go home Saturday afternoon, Charity and Willow came to visit and stayed until Sunday afternoon. Willow is such an attentive cousin. She has such a loving nature and she actually helped us give Aedyn a bath. (Word to the wise, Never go to Denny's on a Saturday night!) Inside joke. It was nice to have our house full of people we love.

After Charity and Willow left we went home, ate, took a short unexpected nap, then headed out to Zender's Christmas store, one of our favorite places to visit during Christmas time. The whole store becomes a winter wonderland, they have complimentary cider and cookies, and they have an awesome train and mountain town display, which of course Shane loves!

All in all, a great weekend!

How we spent our time in the last 6 weeks

Well, I just wanted to share with the world what we have been doing for the last 6 weeks of our life. Note - Please read post before this one!

Besides caring for our newborn, Aedyn, we were able to get to know his birthparents very well. (At times, too well if you catch my drift- LOL). Just kidding, they are turly great people. We were able to share some of the splendor of living in Southern California with them. We were able to take them to beach with the dogs, to our favorite park with the lake, our outdoor mall to get gelato,YUM, celebrate Halloween and most exciting of all Disneyland! Oh yeah, they also got to experience LA traffic and the lovely smokey fumes from the California wildfires. Amber and I also worked on a scrapbook for her Mom, which I had such a good time doing. It is so addicitive once you get started!

We were able to introduce Aedyn to some of his new family as well. His first visitor was Grammy Bev; she came to the hospital to see him. Aedyn also met Granny Moore and Grandpa Moore and we took his first restaurant visit to Macaroni Grill. Cousin Nina and Brian came over for some dinner and games(laundry as well). Aunt Kathy and Uncle Jon, came with Grammy and we all went to the park. My 'little sister" Amanda and her mom came to the house on a Friday evening. Aedyn metUncle Jason, Aunt Jen and cousin Kaitlyn at Aunt Jen's baby shower,(that's right Aedyn will have a cousin close to his age, Jen is due around Thanksgiving). He is looking forward to meeting the rest of his family ASAP.

There have been plenty of trips to the grocery store and Target to get supplies, formula,diapers, and food. We have also been on the internet and phone talking to lawyers and other adoption professionals for endless hours, as well. Shane was able to only take one week off, while trying to get through work sleep-deprived and complete his college coursework. Besides the obvious new challenges in life, Life is good!

Our First Family Blog (with a little adoption history)

Today I took the the leap forward to create our Family Blog. We are a new family of 3, created by the blessing of adoption. Two wonderful people, Amber and Hugh, chose us to be the parents of their baby boy and we are forever grateful!

Here's a little history on how we got here today. After years, about 9, of failed infertility treatments and 1 miscarriage, we decided about a year ago, in August, to pursue adoption for creating and growing our family. We chose the Independent Adoption Center to work with. We were "on the books" waiting to be picked by a birthmother starting November 1. We were contacted by several birthmothers before being picked by a birthmother in San Diego on January 31st. She gave birth to a baby boy on March 15 and placed him in our care for one month. Unfortunately, this person decided to reclaim him. We were devastated, and grieved and waited for our forever child to come home to us.

On July 26th, a Thursday evening, a young woman, all of 17 years of age, called us (actually her cousin called) after receiving our letter from the IAC. We hit it off, and decided to meet in person, and we all 4 decided to match and agree to an adoption placement. We hit bumps along the road dealing with the babies' heritage, he is 1/8 Chukchansi Indian, and the tribe decided they wanted to intervene and not allow Amber and Hugh's adoption placement preference with us to happen. At this point the IAC decided not to work with the case.

Amber and Hugh, were committed to placing their child with us and wanted to talk to the tribe in person, so we agreed to fly them to our home and meet the tribe to ask them to change their mind. We made an appointment on September 24th with the tribal council, but a little surprise came our way first! The baby came early and we all had to deal with the torn emotions of the situation. We both separately, Amber and Hugh, and us were trying to provide comfort and love but without getting too attached to the baby. A very hard task to undertake, but the fact that he was a month early and had to be in the NICU for his first two week made it bearable.

Aedyn James Moore (or James Mitchell Lewis which is his name on the original birth certificate) was born on September 21, 2007 at Simi Valley Hospital at 3:06 am. He weighed 5 lbs. 11 oz. and was 20 inches long. His lungs were a little underdeveloped and he had to have help breathing,so he was transferred to Northridge Hospital where he spent the first two weeks of his life. We traveled back and forth daily visiting and taking care of him in the hospital. He was able to come home with us on October 4th.

Amber and Hugh stayed with us for 6 weeks until we could get things sorted out. Because the IAC was no longer involved we had to hire a lawyer, an adoption service provider, and a psychologist to get this adoption done. We now have what is called an independent adoption. We were going to have to go court on November 2nd to sign relinquishments, (two kinds - regular and Indian), but because of the ICWA law the tribe had the right to ask for continuance, and they did. We had already bought tickets for Amber and Hugh to return home November 4th, so we went to the adoption service provider to have them sign the regular relinquishments so they could return home. They will fly back out here to sign the Indian relinquishments in court, if necessary, when we have a secure date agreed upon by the tribe.

So, as of right now, Aedyn is OUR SON! Our journey with Hugh and Amber has been a windy road, but it is truly a blessing to have had them in our home and share this time with us. What a true gesture of their commitment to us and unconditional love for Aedyn they showed and with such great fortitude. I talked with Amber last night, and she sounded happy to be home, with her family and friends, but a little sad as well. We will continue a relationship with Aedyn's birthfamily throughout his entire life. There will never be any doubt that he was and is loved by them.

So, I will end this post by saying thank you to GOD! I prayed for a birthfamily that Shane and I could truly celebrate, one that would feel like extended family. Even though our roller coaster ride is not over, we feel extremely blessed to have a beautiful baby boy in our hearts and arms!